I moved to the city just before Christmas and got a bachelor apartment near the downtown core and my job. It was great walking to work in the morning while listening to the traffic reports. I obviously didn’t miss the commute.
Everything was coming together as planned. I was saving most of my pay-check and looking forward to the day that I’d give my two weeks notice. What I didn’t know was that the time would come sooner, rather than later.
I got caught up in a political mess at work, stepped on some toes, and got called into the boss’s office. He handed me my second warning letter (the first was for having a 3 martini lunch a while back) and later that day, I handed him my two weeks notice.
Afterwards, I felt a sick sense of panic as I realized I had just thrown away all the security I had in the world. I also flushed all those years of exemplary work down the toilet – not to mention my pension and whatnot. I felt as though I had nothing – alone and scared, I went into a depression for a few weeks.
It would be hard for me to adequately describe the days following my resignation, except to say that I felt as though I had detached myself from security and life in the “normal” world. It’s one thing to think about quitting, but another to actually do it. What’s that saying? “This shit just got real.”
I thought they might have escorted me out of the building, but I guess they needed me to work with my replacement to ensure a smooth transaction. Actually, I half expected them to counter with a proposal (a raise, perhaps). That just wasn’t in the cards, however. I worked my last 2 weeks to rule, and was probably not very helpful to my replacement (although he was a decent sort).
I was totally taken back by the lack of concern on their (management) part. They acted as though nothing had happened, and the office continued to hum along (and would continue to hum, long after I was gone).
I now know that anyone is replaceable in a corporation, and although you may think you are irreplaceable, you’re not. The corporate machine will stay intact and carry on.
I doubt that I would have accepted a counter offer, but it just burns my ass that nothing was offered at all.
The whole experience was like breaking up with a long-time girlfriend or wife. My job was a big part of my life and much of who I was as a person. It didn’t entirely determine my sense of purpose or self-worth, but it certainly was a big influence.